i bought pants there.
2 pair.
and underwear and socks.

on nov 7th i went to NYC.
lucked out and saw letterman show.
bought clothes.
had fun with kreber and clam.
went down to pureed nought twice.
the flight there and back was awesome.
had to come in straight to work early.
was very tired.

two weeks ago i started smoking.
saddening.
it had been five years.
maddening.

i sold my AFI tickets for 2wice what i paid for them.

* * *

last night i thought i heard the man on the tv says tummybirds.
now... i don't know about you, but i ain't never heard of tummybirds.
and he didn't even say that.
said something completely different and unrelated.
but i thought it would be a good replacement word for when you is nervous like.
like when you tell people you have bitter fries in your stomach.

peptalk abyssmal

seen some really good films.
until today. some really disappointing Canadian shorts.
its enough to make one apoplectic thinking these were even
considered nevermind programmed.

Sokurov screenings sold-out.
cannot figure if those is a good thing or not.

ZeD launches tomorrow.

i hate film snobs.
i do not hate myself.
i am a film snob.
apparently.

i was being dramatic.
i have forgiven all my sins.

weird days. some good. some not. i did a Brian Wilson yesterday.
saw The Raveonettes tonight. they remind me of Jesus and Mary Chain and
My Bloody Valentine a bit. And a bit of Roxette and of course stellastar,
who opened. The tie-in between JMC and Brian Wilson wasn't deliberate.
Genius though.

John McLaughlin last thursday was excellent. even though i was
preoccupied with the thought it was costing me nearly a dollar a minute.
it was worth it. nice to witness bliss. zakir hussain pronounced it McLau-f-in.

Finally saw Distant (Uzak). l love this film and others like it. Roger Ebert said something
to the effect there's too many films with middle-aged guys with moustaches smoking
and thinking and smoking that end on a long take about nothing. its true, i agree.
i wish i could hyperlink to the quote but i cannae find it. anyway i agree with him
but i like those films. he's referring to the Kiarostami's and Angelopoulos' and their
contemporaries. the best directors of these times. film to me, is the second best
way to experience culture.

i am saddened that i cannot see as many VIFF films as i have in past years. I treasured
my volunteer pass and the forty or so films i could manage. i hate film snobs.

i hate myself.

need to change that.

so i have finally seen some taviani films.
its been worth the wait.

works going okay. i guess.
long story.

looking forward to VIFF.
my program guide is nice and marked up.

everybody loves a dog with a cone on its head,
beside the white plums,
so delicate, so svelte,
grazed by light lime water.

i wish i could post here while i'm biking to work
before my thoughts dissipate and my mind
is filled with boring, useless crap.

i need advice

ok, so swinkylass sends me this following email.
if i knew how to make comments
on me blog thing i'd be able to ask all you
out there in vacuumland for input.

ya'll have any interest in seeing any of the following?
I'd be up for seeing any/all. Not sure of if all tickets
will be comps though.

the walkmen -- sept 18 -- richards
mogwai -- sept 26 -- commodore
manitoba -- sept 26 -- sonar
the kills -- sept 27 -- richards
raveonettes -- sept 28 -- richards
jets/kings of leon -- sept 30 -- richards
brmc/stratford 4 -- october 5 -- commodore
my morning jacket -- october 8 -- richards
calla -- october 14 -- sonar
grandaddy/starlight mints -- october 16 -- commodore
peaches -- october 21 -- richards
prefuse 73/four tet -- october 24 -- richards
broadcast -- october 30 -- richards
beulah/john vanderslice -- october 31 -- tbc

From Buses and Starlight

alone at the window an old face stays
barely able to move let alone breathe
and the stains on the counters keep the roaches at bay
turning, there sparkles the carpet alive with chirping of fleas
and the bristle of static as the gasplug ignites
makes folks on the horizon look out in the night.

hugh hefner in drag
pulls on a fag and calls him
mr. hugh janus

* * *

wholey shit
summer's over.
i start work tumorrow.

oh and
buy the whey
emails fixed now

um. right. organic chemical at 12am does this to you.
work sucks! i can't believe the things my boss said to me today.
i cried 3 times today all for completely opposite reasons and
Mr. Symos said that the manager was right in attacking Cyndi's
parents last week.

i hate it when she does that.
i hate it when anyone doesn't take me seriously. even little things.
its just so, degrading. and you wonder why i never think the things
i say are important. or why i am so melodramatic, just to get
some attention. Fuck it sucks getting old.

oh my god, alex came over today to show me his new dog.
its so cute it hearts. We are DEFINITELY in love.

god, i havent really written here in soo long. nothing eventful
has happened though. i think my sister meet a guy who she likes [all
she says is "he's NICE"...the worst, most overused word
in the english language]...yeah, nothing to great with me though. ive been
getting really excited for work and the new year. i have so many 'resolutions'.
of which i will probably only achieve like, two. here's part of the
looonnnnggg list [work with me, i dont have it written anywhere...
just improvising] it starts with the most wanted that i can think
of now....

1. TO GAIN WAIT...this, of course, has been my one and
only most desired wish since...oh, i dont know, FOREVER!
2. get a friggin car already!...i no, the gas is pricey but we really need
one...my dad is just too damn picky [i guess that's where
i get that from]
3. have the most amazing birthday, ever. SEPTEMBER 11th, all the way!!
4. some how get tix to Burning Man-- sep 1st...see the urgency?
5. have a fantabulous first few weeks of work [sub-list: finish decorating
my boss--i don't even wanna know how]

now for the more extravagant-never-going-to-happen-
not-even-in-your-dreams list [my fave]:

6. meet Fiona Forbes...gawd, i love her!!!! [sub: her b-day is jan 12...isn't it
perfect?!?]
7. or rather, just snowboard with her ;)
8. get better on the slopes...see the dilemma?
9. meet hilary duff [get her CD--yesterday!!...metamorphosis, wtf?!? could
that get any more generic?! no offense.]
10. finish song sketches....arg!
11. be happy
12. be sucessful
13. be recognised
14. stop the injuries [i have way too many and they get in the way
of my life...ouch, pain now] but as they say: no pain, no gain...um, sure.
15. GET FATTER and stay that way!!!!!!!!!!!!! this is my ultimate goal in
life. i gain wait but then i dont stay there...its a bummmer.

okay, that's my list...there's more, but im not wanting to write them, so.
i forgot about alex! oh well. we will always be together.
oh, yeah, i wish i had so kind of writing talent. i wanna learn to swing a
pen. its not fair, whenever i see J she always has some new gig; a new
instrument that she's taught herself. i hate that. thats one of my
pet peeves; me being talentless while others have talent--actually,
that doesnt bother me so much as their bragging about it. arg.
other weird pet peeve: eyebrows. not that i dont want ANY, but when
they're all wrong. i guess that's a little superficial of me and i shouldn't
be so concerned with looks--you know, considering--but it still bothers
me to no end, i really should carry around a pair of tweezers, like that
woman from hilary duff's band.

luv christian.

sorry folks, the email is still busted.
the domain is renewed and we have a host
but the email is still BUSTED.

"nosmo's only 2345 miles from the snokkelammie"

happy valentine's day
and to all those "a kreber!"
buy now pook

the spiders are bad this year.
by bad i mean there are many of them
in the house,
which isn't fair.
big ones.
they may be hobo spiders.
that's what they seem to be.

my email (christian@******.net) still isn't working.
my last name@yahoo.com in the meantime.

do not register a domain with namesdirect.
it is hell.
faceless hell.

i am tempted to find another blog
and cut and paste into mine.
i'm tired.

its all so..
overwhelming.

i took a late ferry tonight and could see the fireworks
from way out on the georgia straight.
and mars was as bright as venus would usually be.
who would have thought?
a dog could be heard barking as we slipped beneath the waves.